When the boy makes that off-base comment when walking into the ice cream shop and you catch him and scold him and try to make the truth loud but he can't hear the truth right there and it's troubling what he said, so you pursue it deeper later. And he says something that makes your soul stumble backwards a few steps and you realize that his comment at the ice cream place didn't necessarily mirror the truth, but it was a mirror of your own complaining, whining attitude and that, well, that is a crummy reflection.

When these last years have been a tough season in some aspects and you've let it all go out of your mouth, the disappointment, the anxiousness to move on, and while those things are okay to process through, at some point the words have become a vomit of sorts, spewing all over everyone.

When the dissatisfaction with life takes over the boy but it wasn't his disappointment necessarily, it was him processing life through your stuff, your complaints, your grumbling because his snarky attitude was really just a manifestation of your snarky attitude. When he looks honestly into your eyes and says, "Why should I find things to be thankful for? No one else in the family is doing that." and that stings because you know better. You know the way you've been lavished with grace from God, from family, from friends, yet you are thankless. Ouch.

Because all this is grace. Grace in the realizing and knowing, grace in the forgiveness of parenting failures, grace in the changing your ways, grace in the second millionth chance at a do-over, grace in the truth uncovered. And for all that grace upon grace upon grace, you are grateful.

let love and faithfulness never leave you. bind them around your neck write them on the tablet of your heart